Title: Rat Problem
Rating: Hard R(PG-13 at some points)
Warning: language, naughty coffin sex(sort of), biting(yay) and Riley
Disclaimer: I unfortunately own nothing remotely related to Joss' work. Althought I really wish I did.
Summary: Buffy only had a small mission to do. Take pictures and report back to Giles. But of course, when a certain sexy blond vampire tags along...things don't always work out for the best...or do they? (I know cheesy summary)
A/N: This is only partially beta'd. I may not get the rest beta'd(unless someone volunteers).
Riley came running back to the others, shaking his head. “No one’s there. The place is empty.” He said.
“So…what does that mean?” Xander asked.
Giles sighed. “It means that they’re going to bring the demons in.” he said, looking around.
“So…what do we do now?” Willow asked.
“Well, in the pictures Buffy had I saw coffins. Did you see any?” Giles asked Riley. He shook his head. “Which could possibly mean…that the might’ve got into one of the coffins.”
“Why? I doubt Buffy really wanted to be that undercover.” Xander said.
“Well, they were chased weren’t they? Reason why they ran and dropped the camera.” Willow said.
“Ah, yes. So, we can look around for more clues.” Giles said. Riley led the way back to the warehouse. They looked around the perimeter.
“Found something!” Xander called. They came rushing over. “Think I found where they might’ve disappeared.” Riley bent down and picked up his camera. He looked over it thoroughly and saw that it was okay.
Giles rolled his eyes. “So they ran around the corner. They must’ve found a way in.” He said, walking away. They followed him and found the slightly jarred back door. They went in and looked around.
“Isn’t that were the coffins were?” Willow asked. Giles nodded. “So, what? Spike and Buffy jumped in them?”
“I doubt it. Being as they were chased and in a hurry, I’d say they’re in one together.” Giles said.
“Ohhh, great. Now Bleach Wonder will have a snack.” Xander said.
“He can’t bite her, Xander. He’s got a chip.” Willow said.
“Which is why Spike still picks fights. He can fight with the chip.” Xander said.
“Besides the point. We need to find them.” Giles said.
“Can you contact your guy? See if he knows anything about where they might go,” Riley said. Giles nodded. “So for now, we can just head back.” They all nodded.
Buffy turned her nose up at the plate of a greasy burger and fries that the waitress sat down in front of her. Spike grinned. “I asked for a salad.” Buffy said, looking up at her. “And you look like you need to eat.” She said.
Suddenly Buffy’s stomach growled. Spike laughed. “Thought so.” Said the waitress before she walked off.
“Luv, eat it. You need to keep your strength up.” Spike said, curling his tongue. Buffy blushed instantly.
She sighed and took the burger in both hands and took a large bite. Her eyes rolled then and she moaned at the taste. Spike laughed again. “I take it, it’s good.”
“Oh my God! Spike, I have never had a burger like this before! I mean, really I’ve never had a burger!” Buffy exclaimed.
“Really? Why not?” Spike asked.
Buffy shrugged and took another bite. She chewed and then swallowed. “Well, before I was…you know. I was a cheerleader. I had to keep fit. So I ate really healthy. Not much meat, never burgers or greasy foods. And even after…you know, I just kept it up. I mean I ate a little more calories, but not much. Plus Riley says it’s better for me to stay my size. Even Slayers can get fat.” Buffy explained.
Spike snorted. “He’s fullashite,” Spike said. Buffy raised an eyebrow as she ate. “Slayer, you could be as big as a bloody biker chit or bigger than a truck and ’d still shag you five ways to Sunday.” Buffy’s face became completely red.
“A-are you serious?” she asked.
Spike grinned. “I saw you when you were still a bit chubby. With your lil baby fat. ‘S cute. Plus, you’re too skinny. You could stand to gain…five, maybe ten pounds. Besides you could keep it even with the…you know.” Spike said with a smirk.
“Really?” Buffy asked. Spike gave her a look. She shrugged. “Well, I mean this is really good. And Giles does get on me about eating more calories. But Ri-”
“Luv, Riley’s an idiot. I don’ know why you lot don’ see it. Maybe Rupes does. The bloke only cares abou’ himself and his lovely things. I can tell that just by his type and,” Spike lowered his voice and Buffy leaned forward some. “By that heavy duty vibrator you use.”
If Buffy’s face was red before…it just got redder. She went to slap Spike, but he caught her wrist. He yanked her out of her seat and into his lap. He wrapped his arms around her and grinned. “Now you cannot tell me that our lil rump in the coffin didn’ leave you more satisfied than Soldier Boy.”
Buffy just looked away from him and didn’t say anything. Spike grinned. He set her next to him and pulled her plate over to her. Without saying a word, Buffy began to eat again. Spike stole a fry as he waited for his milkshake.
Next part here.